[IELTS WRITING 정복기] TASK2 IT관련 논쟁- 8

-정말 이글은 고난이도인듯하다.. 수준에 안맞아서 효과가 클지는 모르것다..
-모델에세이 따온곳에서 설명을 읽었음에도 불구하고, 이글은 어렵다.
-문제일단 자세히 이해하고, intro를 사실-상대방의견-내가동의하는의견- 앞으로전개할 애기
- 본론1 에 장점 - 단점도 가치 쓰고 하다보면 cohesion 에서 점수 잃기가 쉽단다..
- 본론2 에는 단점- topic + support1
- 본론3 에는 추가적인 단점 및 해결책 암시 - topic + support 1
- 결론 에는 질문한번더 언급후 단점이 많다고 의견 제시

난 대부분 paragraph을 본론 2개만 하는데.. 저렇게 하다보니 쓸말들이 부족하더라..
차라리 3개로 쪼개서 이렇게 배열해가지고 topic +support 1 정도로 구성하는것도.. 나쁘지 않은것 같다.. 이게더 안전한건가? 실수를 줄일 수 있는 폼? 일단 첨삭 나오는거 보고 판단할란다 두개 형식으로 제출했으니..

모델에세이 베껴쓰기 12일차...8개모델에세이를 각 10번씩 필사중에 있다.. 이제 손가락 감각이 조금 무뎌진거 같기도 하다. 인간은 진화하는듯..

In the last 20 years there have been significant developments in the field of information technology (IT), for example the World Wide Web and communication by email. However, future developments in IT are likely to have more negative effects than positive. To what extent do you agree with this view?

The last two decades have seen enormous changes in the way people’s lives are affected by IT, with many advances in this field. However, while these technological advances have brought many benefits to the world, it can be argued that future IT developments will produce more negative effects than positive ones.

To begin, email has made communication, especially abroad, much simpler and faster, resulting in numerous benefits for commerce and business. Furthermore, the World Wide Web means that information on every conceivable subject is now available to us. For example, people can access news, medical advice, online education courses and much more via the internet. It is evident that these improvements have made life far easier and more convenient for large numbers of people and will continue to do so for decades to come.

Nevertheless, the effects of this new technology have not all been beneficial. For example, many people feel that the widespread use of email is destroying traditional forms of communication such as letter writing, telephone and face-to-face conversation. This could result in a decline in people’s basic ability to socialize and interact with each other on a day-to-day basis.

In addition, the large size of the Web has meant that it is nearly impossible to regulate and control. This has led to many concerns regarding children accessing unsuitable websites and viruses. Unfortunately, this kind of problem might even get worse in the future at least until more regulated systems are set up.

In Conclusion, developments in IT have brought many benefits, yet I believe developments relating to new technology in the future are likely to produce many negative effects that must be addressed if we are to avoid damaging impacts to individuals and society.

 

a source came from -http://englishwithyeasir.blogspot.co.uk/